I always knew I was meant to be a mom. Even through the toughest moments of having a newborn, I still enjoyed every minute of it! That’s not to say it wasn’t the hardest, most unexpected experience I’ve had so far, but for the first time I felt as if I had a purpose. As much as I wanted to stay home with my son after he was born, financially it wasn’t an option for our family. While I enjoyed certain aspects of my “job” at the time, it WAS just a job and unfortunately didn’t satisfy my passion for helping people, bringing people together and had nothing to do with babies or being a mom! I found myself craving more interaction with other new moms and reading every piece of information that would make me more informed to be the best mom I could be. I felt stuck. I felt as if I’d never be able to have a career that would combine my passion and earn enough income to help support my family. I wanted something that would satisfy my intellectual desire but allow a flexible schedule so I could be home with my son enough of the time. I wanted to be able to take him to music classes, take walks before the sun went down and visit with other mom friends and their babies. Too much to ask?
At the time, it WAS too much to ask so I put it in the back of my mind, hoping one day something might change. Well, sure enough…it did. When my son was a year and a half, my husband was promoted and relocated from Los Angeles to Orange County. I was able to leave my “job” and set out on the next part of my journey. I knew I’d need to go back to work eventually, but I had no idea what I would do next. Sometimes the universe has bigger plans for us and when we make room for new things in our lives, they miraculously seem to appear.
The most important thing for new moms is a support system. I found that Orange County was missing a good structured mommy and me program that was designed to support new moms in their new role. So, for the first time since having my son, it never felt so clear what I was meant to be doing. The very thing I thought I’d never be able to do: own my own business, have a flexible schedule to be home with my son and help new moms, was now the exact opportunity I had waiting at my fingertips. It took me no more than six weeks to be up and running with my support groups and so began the most exciting and fulfilling journey in my personal life and professional career (aside from being a mom!).
My words of wisdom (if you can call them that!) to all women and moms:
- Never lose sight of what you want. It may not come at the moment you want it, but it will come when the moment is right.
- Don’t ever be embarrassed by your desires after your baby is born! If you planned on being a stay-at-home mom but you can’t wait to get back to work, don’t feel badly! Instead, give yourself the credit you deserve by being able to recognize that it’s going to be best for you and your family to be a working mom. If you planned on going back to work but you can’t imagine being away from your child, what a nice surprise this will be!
- Nothing is forever! This is the best piece of advice I was given while I was pregnant. As humans, we are constantly changing. Babies are no exception. Just know that every tough phase is just a phase and will turn itself around. It is a wonderful reminder for every part of our lives!
- Your family’s needs come first. Don’t say “yes” to others when you really mean “no”. It will only cause resentment and more stress within yourself.
- Make sure to take time for yourself. While it seems as though being a mom is about being selfless, you’re actually doing yourself and your family a disservice by not taking time for yourself. If you don’t put the oxygen mask on first, you won’t have enough oxygen to help those around you.
- Quality time with your girlfriends is a must! Who knew our girlfriends would become what gets us through?!
- JOIN A MOMMY GROUP! Nothing prepares you for having a newborn, but being surrounded by other new moms going through exactly what you are is a lifesaver during such an overwhelming transition.
– Alexandra Spitz, Mom and Founder of OC Mommy and Me www.ocmommyandme.com